As humans, but especially as women, we often prioritise other people’s wants and needs before our own – we show them love and respect, hype them up when needing encouragement, respect their boundaries, and give compliments freely. But why is it so hard to show that same love and respect to ourselves?

If you struggle with the concept of self love, and are constantly putting evvvveryone else at the top of your to-do list, with you-time right at the very bottom, living in the land of “maybe one day, if I get time”, then these tips are for you!

5 Top Tips for self love + acceptance

1 - Focus on your strengths and best qualities.
This is for everyone, but especially those who are struggling with their body image. If you think about why those around you love you, and I mean *really* think about it, would being a few kilos lighter, or heavier, make a difference to your best qualities and the parts of you that really make an impact? Consider making a list of things you do love about yourself – personality traits, skills, achievements, anything that makes you feel good about yourself – and refer back to it on days you’re feeling not-so-great. Nobody would stand up at your funeral and say they miss your perfectly flat tummy or how your cellulite-free legs changed their life, but they absolutely would miss how kind hearted, generous, loving or funny you are, right?

2 – Engage in positive self talk.
How many times a day do you think negatively about yourself, or your body? A 2009 study observed 100 women who were asked to use a clicker to measure any time they experienced a negative about their body, and the results were an astounding 36 negative thoughts about themselves/their bodies per day. That’s 252 times per week! Some women registered these thoughts as frequently as every three minutes, so in order to combat that, try amplifying your positive thoughts more regularly – think of examples from your list of things you like about yourself, give yourself compliments, celebrate your wins and achievements, and focus on more gratitude from within the day to drown out those negative thoughts and give them less air-time!

3 - Put yourself at the top of your to-do list.
We all know that in case of emergency, we’re told to put on our own oxygen mask before helping others, but it shouldn’t have to be life-or-death for us to actually put ourselves first! Many of us lead busy, active lives, with responsibilities at home, work, within our relationships, and family obligations, so where exactly do you fall on that list of tasks each day? Try carving out even 5-10 minutes in the morning, or anywhere in the day that you can squeeze it in, to get some alone time, pop on some headphones and get in your own little bubble to allow yourself to recharge. You can’t pour from an empty cup, so make sure you stop and refill regularly!

4 - Actively demonstrate love and respect for yourself and your body.
If you’re prone to either neglecting your health + wellness when things get busy, OR punishing yourself with under eating and over exercising, it’s time to switch gears and find that happy place in the middle! Think of how you’d care for your body (and mind) if you already loved yourself – how would you exercise if you already had your dream physique? How would you eat if you were trying to nourish a body you love and respect? What would you do for self care if you truly prioritised yourself? You might need to start with small, manageable steps, but actions taken from a place of love and compassion will get you FAR further than coming from a place of hate and desperation, so start treating yourself like someone you love, and soon enough you’ll have no choice but to feel it, it’s contagious!!

5 - Celebrate your accomplishments.
I constantly want to shout this one from the rooftop, but girl you need to CLAP FOR YOUR DAMN SELF! We all get so caught up in everything we’re not, all the things we’re yet to achieve, and all the ways someone else is better/thinner/more productive/more successful than us… but how often do you actually stop and celebrate your wins and achievements along the way? I bet there are SO many elements to your life now that only existed in a dream a few years ago, and look at you now! So even if things aren’t perfect, even if you have improvements you want to make within yourself or your life, stop and smell the roses once in a while, and give yourself a little pat on the back for everything you’ve done that’s gotten you this far. I’m proud of you, and you should be too!

Sami Rose is a Registered Counsellor and Online Coach, specialising in anxiety management, confidence coaching, disordered eating, and body image concerns, as well as general counselling and self-development.

Sami offers a range of services including 1:1 Counselling Sessions, Premium Health + Fitness Coaching (based on Mindful Eating framework and creating a healthy relationship with food and your body), and has a signature program “Befriending Your Body”, which provides education and support to help those struggling with binge eating and body image issues.

Check Her Out:

Website: https://samirose.com.au
Instagram: @samirose